Day 9 of Adaptation

"Your presence in my heart is comforting enough. That can make my worries and sadness go away"

Not a single day went by without me thinking of her. All the daily routine things make me think of her like, is she awake? What she eats today? Has she eats? Is she working? Until when she's working? How's she doing? And etc. All sort of taking care about each other things. Sometimes, it just a simple gesture but it was such a complex feelings involved. Like she used to bring me food during my call, or at least, she used to come and visit me during morning or before lunch break or at night after night rounds. She always make time for me eventhough she's so damn tired after working, or she was busy with something else, but still, she'll make a huge effort just to see me and fulfilling my wish to see her too. I remember, there was this time when she had one full day locum in an area about 45mins away, and suddenly around midnight she called and told me that she was outside, waiting to see me. She drove straight away from there to hospital and I was so surprised because she looked so tired that night, and yet still came all the way when she can just go home and call it a day.

So not having her now, feels weird. Everytime I'm oncall now would feels weird. Because I'm so used to have her visit me, seeing her, talking to her, received food or drinks from her, hugging her so tight before she drove back home, saying goodnights and see you again tomorrow, and text me when you arrived things, and now there would be no more. So it's definitely, feels weird.

If I lie down, thinking and looking back all the sacrifices that she had made for me, I would never have chance to repay. She is someone I believe will stand behind me and do everything that she's capable of just to make me happy. I forever thanks her that. I'm maybe not the kind of person who is worthy enough to ever received all those sacrifices, but I hope, everything that she's ever done to make me happy, one day God grants her the most happiness in her life as well.

So just because of one hassle, doesn't mean I would have to forget thousands of parallel. Right?